"However, I deeply believe that our intelligence, which is inborn with us, Romanians, will help us defeat our adversaries-" this is how a soccer coach of a Romanian team just facing a European cup game ended his speech a few days ago on television. According to the expert eye of the distinguished coach, the two teams due to meet the next day in the field (namely "our boys" and "their boys"!) seemed so similar, that they would eternalize any soccer confrontation: their boys played offensively, but our boys played offensively, too; their boys were tall and strong, but our boys were tall and strong, too; their boys had the combined game as a main weapon, but look, that was also our boys' favorite weapon! So far, all the two teams, ours and theirs, could do was be happy with a draw game, not only honorable to both sides, but also lofty, owing to the dignity exhibited in a fight between two competitors who were absolutely twins! Except… Except with a last spark of lucidity, our coach discovered a forgotten secret weapon, and not just for now, like a forward brought form the teenage team, on the contrary. God! One coming from the atavistic fund of treasures the nation this team was part of-well, how shall we put it? Well, maybe we should just not put it! The team he trains. Well, this surprise, this secret national weapon was… intelligence! Our native intelligence. From now on, things seem to have been decided in this game. Of course, those boys would score at first; immediately afterwards, though, as we were their equals, we would score in turn. Then they would score again, let us say; we would equal that immediately. Until minute number 90, when spectators in a hurry get out of the stadium, with tears in their eyes due to the thrill of such an egalitarian game, so I am saying at the 90th minute, with a last effort, who do you think would show up out of nowhere to score in our favor? The forward having number nine on his shirt? No, he would just be a ruin! Then who, the goalie? No, I will answer. Do not even try to guess, you cannot. Because it will be her, none else, springing out from the turf or coming down from our national heavens: our own native intelligence! Our decisive intelligence. I do not know where this myth of our decisive intelligence comes from. Along with the belief that, in a contest of nations, we would defeat others precisely due to this intelligence! That we can be poor, we can have bad luck, but in exchange, we are intelligent, nobody can compete with us in that respect. When everybody knows we are masters at missing all sorts of opportunities of history, precisely because we approached them less intelligently. When everybody can see how we struggle in a rich country (rich in mineral ores, nothing else), precisely because this country is run less intelligently. When everybody agrees that our products are often better than other people's, but they are presented and launched on the world market in a manner that is famous precisely due to its lack of intelligence. So I have a hard time figuring out how come this myth of our infallible intelligence emerged! And then, let us say it is so, and that we are great intelligence producers. I pray to God to forgive me, but I do not see the use of that! Because if we look at the results, you do not see intelligence helping us! On the contrary, it hurts us. It scores where we do not need. Generally, after the referee's final whistle.
by Cătălin Ţîrlea (b. 1964)
